Wedding Dress Horror

wedding dress

My wedding day was first approaching and I had bought my dress a few months earlier. When I knew that I would be trying on wedding dresses, I had this fabulous idea of losing those few extra nagging pounds that I had been putting off getting rid of. I started going to the gym, replacing treats with carrot sticks, all that fun stuff. So when it came to dress shopping I felt rather smug, being able to fit into a smaller dress size. So the big day was nearly here, and you know, keeping up with that gym thing can get rather tedious and eating carrot sticks unless, they are drenched in full fat ranch, is just flat-out boring. So I was back in the routine of relaxing on the couch eating my favorite snacks, not a veggie in sight.

A few days before my wedding, I think I thought it was wise to try my dress on one last time. Excitedly I slip it on, but hang on, this can’t be the same dress, this one is way too tight!  I yell for my sister and she gasps in horror as she realizes I cannot zip up my dress! And yes it is the same dress, I have just enjoyed myself far too much these last couple of months. Need a plan. Three days before the wedding and out come the carrot sticks and gym shoes. Sadly, though… Not. Enough. Time.

It’s my wedding day and I feel like I am wearing a corset. It’s okay though, I was able to zip my dress up, I just can’t breathe.  The time comes for the sit down meal and I am starving, salads these last few days just haven’t been hitting the spot. It looks and smells delicious. My sister was sitting next to me and while hopefully everyone was distracted, I ask her to quickly unzip the back of my dress so I can fit some food in my stomach.  What a relief, I could breathe, I could relax and eat.

I was having a wonderful time and forgot all about my dress as I was feeling so comfortable, that was, until the dishes had been cleared away and an announcement was made that the bride and groom were to have the first dance. I was about to get up until I heard my sister gasping for air she was laughing so hard. My dress was still undone! She sneakily tried to zip it up but I should have taken it easy on the rolls. There was no way this dress was going to be zipped. I side stepped it out of my chair and kept my back facing the wall, yes I looked odd but it would have been even more odd seeing me with my wedding dress falling off and apparently no desire to zip it up. I quickly whispered the problem to my husband and we came up with a plan.

We probably danced the most boring and quickest dance ever. Me with my back against the wall and both of us just side stepping to the music for about a minute and then side stepped out the door. We received some puzzled looks and my sister who was clearly enjoying herself too much, was crying with laughter.

I thought it would be sad to pack away the dress, but no, not sad at all. I have never been so glad to see my comfy sweats.  We were at the airport hotel, ready to jet off for our honeymoon the next day. I scanned the room for my suitcase… Hang on… No suitcase in sight. We are three hours from home with no suitcases, ready to leave for our honeymoon, but that’s another story.

(photo courtesy of Marianmocanu/