“Hang on I have to zip my coat real quick. See you guys inside in 45 to 80 minutes.” – 4-year olds.
— Andrew O. (@TheOrvedahl) March 7, 2014
I try to eat a lot of dark chocolate because it contains antioxidants even though I have no idea what those are or what they do.
— Matt Goldich (@MattGoldich) March 14, 2014
“to be relaxed, or not to be relaxed, that is the question” — Valium Shakespeare
— Myq Kaplan (@myqkaplan) March 10, 2014
“YES!! THIS IS GREAT!! FUN FUN FUN!!!” *1 min later* “Oh god. The popping. No. This is the worst.” -me at a party where they drop balloons
— Emily Heller (@MrEmilyHeller) February 22, 2014
No cell phones in the movie theater, you say? [gets six-mile chord for landline]
— Nate Fernald (@natefernald) March 12, 2014
It’s my brother’s birthday today. My older brother. Not my oldest brother. The brother between my oldest brother and me. I have two brothers
— Bridger Winegar (@bridger_w) March 12, 2014
