Over the Top

arm wrestling

I was fifteen when I gave muscle-building a second try. My hockey coach wanted the guys on his team to strengthen their forearms to become better puck-shooters. So, for a few weeks I used an ingenious, low-tech workout tool. It was a brick attached to a rope, with the rope attached to a sawed-off broom handle. I’d hold the contraption out in front of me and spool the brick up toward the broom handle using only my forearm muscles.

I did this twice each day for a few weeks. I started to get impressive results (i.e. the muscles in my forearms were now visible). One afternoon I walked up to my Dad, pointed at my left forearm, and said, “Hey, check out this bad-boy.”

Dad peered down at my arm. He stared for a moment and then said, “I think I need my glasses.”

Hah hah, very funny.

Dad grinned and said, “Bet ya can’t beat Mom at arm wrestling.”

Mom was 5’5″ and weighed 110 pounds. She grew up on a farm, so she was tough, but I knew I could take her.

We sat down across from each other at the dinner table. Mom rolled up her sleeve, revealing a small upper arm and an even smaller forearm. Puny girl stuff, if truth be told.

We locked hands. I decided I’d take it easy before slowly pinning her hand. That’s how Dad always did it when I was younger — he’d shake his arm, pretending to be losing, and then gently push my hand to the table.

Dad said “Ready, set, go!”

Mom weighed in with incredible force, like she was yanking an ear of corn from the ground. Two seconds after the match began my arm flew backward and crashed to the table. My defeat was quick and total. Mom issued a tiny little smile and then went back to washing the dishes.

Dad roared a laugh while I sat there stunned.

Mom is seventy now. And you know what that means. Yup, it might be time for a rematch.

(photo courtesy of Loganban/Dreamstime.com)

About Thomas Sullivan

Thomas Sullivan is the author of "So Much Time, So Little Change" (a collection of humor essays). He also writes short posts for the humor website HumorOutcasts.com . Please visit his author website at: www.thomassullivanhumor.com

About Thomas Sullivan

Thomas Sullivan is the author of "So Much Time, So Little Change" (a collection of humor essays). He also writes short posts for the humor website HumorOutcasts.com . Please visit his author website at: www.thomassullivanhumor.com