When I Took A Maxim To The Gym


I found an old issue of Maxim Magazine that had a fascinating piece about the author Ian Fleming, the creator of James Bond. I couldn’t put the magazine down when I started reading the article.

I was halfway through the article when I realized that my gym would be closing soon and I hadn’t exercised yet that day. I was so immersed in this Fleming article; I decided to take it to the gym with me. There wouldn’t be any problem if I just left the magazine open to the pages about Fleming.

The cover of the men’s magazine was gone, so nobody would know what magazine I had if I wanted to walk in with it under my arm.

It was late at night and the gym was only open for another hour. I found an open treadmill and carefully placed the magazine on the flat display panel. I carefully opened it to the Fleming article. I set the treadmill to a slow jog setting and started reading where I left off at my apartment.

I smiled at two girls my age who strolled by my treadmill. Like me, they were regulars at that late hour. They passed behind me and got on the elliptical machines right next to me. I would flirtatiously glance over at them regularly, and they would look back. I was almost to the end of the article when I thought it would be a good time to check how many calories I had burned.

The magazine was covering the calories display box. I lifted the right side of the magazine, and the entire thing slide off the display, down the side of the treadmill that the girls were on. The only part of the magazine I could grab hold of was the provocative centerfold, so, when it hit the gym floor, the centerfold was on full display.

I punched the stop button on the treadmill and dived for the magazine. As I picked it up, the centerfold remained open. The two girls had a look of horror and disgust on their faces. One was so repulsed – she just froze on her elliptical with her mouth agape. I took the magazine into the locker room, snatched my clothes, and left the gym as quickly as possible.

In fear of running into those two girls again, I never worked out at that hour again. The one time that I can actually admit that I was reading Maxim for an article, I get incredibly embarrassed.

I have never brought another magazine with me to the gym.

(photo courtesy of Xiaoteng123/Dreamstime.com)