Q&A Tuesday*: How Can I be Shorter?

Q&A with The Big Milkshake

Today on Q&A Tuesday, we will address an extremely important question posed by OblongOrange:  

Question: “The majority of the folks wants to get taller. I, being a 6’5″ giant, want to get shorter.  How can I do this?”

Answer: 

Thank you OblongOrange.  I don’t have a foolproof answer.  But here our some ideas that I came across in my research.

— A taller person can look less tall by avoiding matching tops as well as introducing some patterns or stripes on either the top or bottom.  You can find some other clothing suggestions here.

— Shoes and socks add height.

— Hair adds height.

— A back expert I consulted with advised lifting lots of heavy things.  This will compress your disks and gradually reduce your height.  Unfortunately, it may well herniate a disk or two, causing excruciating pain and perhaps necessitating surgery that may or may not work.  But yes, you will be shorter.

— Practice bad posture.  Yes, this too is bad for your back; but again, you will be shorter.

— In his song, You Went The Wrong Way, Old King Louie, songwriter Allan Sherman provided the following historical perspective on getting shorter which I guess is fool-proof if one is really committed to getting shorter and if all else fails:

“We’re gonna take you and the Queen
Down to the guillotine,
And shorten you a little bit.”

guillotine © Kasezo | Dreamstime.com

(Guillotine Photo © Kasezo | Dreamstime.com)

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* If you would like to submit a question for consideration, you can do so in the comment section below or here.  *Please note: We cannot commit to answering any or all submitted questions.