My wife can ask me for practically anything, and I’m putty in her hands. She could ask me for diamonds or even a European trip, and I would acquiesce with a smile. But as a long-time plumber, when she began complaining that her toilet was too low, it was like music to my ears.
Heading for Lowe’s, I thought I’d take it one step further and make it a water-saving toilet. Not only was it 2-1/2″ higher than a standard toilet, but it only used only one gallon per flush. This toilet was so wonderful, all my wife could do was rave about it. As a plumber, I stop at nothing to have the best, so I ended up installing another one for myself.
The first time my wife had her friends over for her semi-annual mah-jongg game, I couldn’t wait to see their reaction after using the washroom. I sat in the adjoining computer room, reading a book as I eagerly waited.
The first to emerge looked shaky.
“Jerry, did I do something wrong when I used the toilet?” she asked in an uncertain tone.
“I don’t know, how did you use it?” I replied in my usual innocent dead-pan manner.
“All I did was flip the handle, and the toilet made an explosion,” she answered with a guilty look, as if she had broken something.
”You’re good to go,” I said, “but next time, don’t press so hard.”
Though the toilet received mixed reviews from her other friends, my wife’s enthusiasm remained unabated. Plus, it went even higher when she saw the precipitous drop in the water bill. If my good fortune continues, she will overlook the latest cashmere coats for maybe a new tankless water heater… GO GREEN!
(photo courtesy of Theo Gottwald/Dreamstime.com)
About Jerry Goldberg
