The Amish Woman with the Victoria’s Secret Bag


I worked in a mall when I was in my early twenties and everyday I would always get the same sandwich at the food court. One Saturday, I’m standing in line to get my lunch, and an Amish woman, wearing a solid-colored, blue dress with long sleeves, a full skirt and a white bonnet, walks by carrying a large Victoria’s Secret bag.

She looked slightly older than me. I kept staring at her in disbelief, shocked by the unusual image.

I was eating my lunch on a bench at one of the entrances of the mall; I always ate there when it was nice outside. I’m sitting there eating and the Amish woman sits right next to me. She placed the Victoria’s Secret bag between us on the long bench. She glances over at me, smiles, and says, “Hello.” She had these intense green eyes.

She asked, “Is it supposed to rain today?”

“I think…they said on the news that there’s a chance.”

“I don’t have a television.”

“Oh…” I stammered, feeling foolish, “…right, duh!”

I took a big bite of my sandwich. If she was truly Amish, how did she know about Victoria’s Secret? Did she just go to the mall and see a piece of lingerie in the window she felt like buying on an impulse. It’s not like she watched the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show at home.

I anxiously tried to think of something clever to say. Idiotically, I blurted out, “Do you know a Zacariah?”

She chuckled and said, “No.”

I asked, “A Daniel?”

“Yes, I know a Daniel,” she admitted.

I took another bite of my sandwich. I glanced over at the bag again.

I went for it, and asked, “I’m just curious…how do you know about Victoria’s Secret?”

She was just about to answer, then, her boyfriend came up out of nowhere. He had a red dyed mohawk, leather jacket with chains and a large ring through his nose.

He kissed her on the lips, and said gleefully, “Hey, beautiful!”

She stood up and grabbed her bag. Her boyfriend shot me a real dirty look and asked her, “This guy bothering you, babe?”

She said I wasn’t and they promptly walked back into the mall holding hands. I took one last bite of my sandwich and threw it in the trash can behind the bench. Then, I started thinking about her boyfriend dressed as a punk rocker. I took my cell phone out of my pocket and checked my calendar.

I learned that day that you should never believe everything you see on the surface, or, if you do, always check your cell phone and make sure it isn’t Halloween.