How I Met My Burger Sweetie

burger

I was 9 years old and already in high school because I was just visiting one to see what it looked like. I guess I looked older than I was because they let me in. [ Read More ]

How NOT To Win And Influence Girls

girls

You know when someone starts a story off by saying “there was this girl” it is going to end badly. [ Read More ]

First Grade, First Love

first grade

Little Leeana has a story about her first grade classmate, Bill, and how he is head-over-heels in love with her! [ Read More ]

My Husband’s Birthday

birthday

The husband’s birthday. I knew I did well this year. I got his present and found THE best hiding place. He will never accidentally find it this year, I thought. [ Read More ]

The Shower Cap

shower cap

My girlfriend’s brother was about five years old and he was in love. [ Read More ]

Lions, Tigers, And Scorpions… Oh My!

scorpion

Moving to Arizona comes with an unspoken tacit agreement that in exchange for no tornadoes, earthquakes or shoveling snow, you are willing to deal with an occasional scorpion in your home. [ Read More ]

Drawing A Bead On Freedom

pluming

Back when I was a third-year plumbing apprentice, our firm won the bidding for a lucrative job—installing all the fixtures in the cells being built in the new addition at Chicago’s Cook County jail. [ Read More ]

An Unexpected Victory (Sort Of)

victory

Biana recalls the most stressful, exciting, amazing, nerve-racking time she had in attempt to achieve victory at state qualifying track match! [ Read More ]

One Way To Get Your Boss’s Attention

boss

Every summer, my sister goes to an annual get-together at the lake with her co-workers from the Marketing Department of the community bank. They all have good senses of humor and get along great. [ Read More ]

Mayday Mayday

boat

My cousin Franco, a nautical adventurist, was towing his boat home from fishing trip when suddenly his car broke down. [ Read More ]

Getting The Cat To The Vet

cat

Perhaps my recent escapade of transporting my cat to the veterinarian for a surgical procedure will ring a bell, however faint, in the minds of all cat owners, (if there is such a thing). [ Read More ]

Window Exit

window

When my window cleaner called for payment, I thanked him and, much to his surprise, asked if he’d used the upstairs bathroom during his visit. [ Read More ]

Magic Beans

fertlizer

My father was always one for a bargain. One day, as he was going for his morning walk, a small bag of what he thought were fertilizer granules fell from the back of a passing truck. [ Read More ]

Zinged By My Family, Episode 4: I am a Connoisseur

Zinged

July 19, 2014: Dear Secret Diary, I made a ridiculously obvious statement in a recent conversation with my son that engendered the following exchange. [ Read More ]

My Amicable Divorce

divorce

About a year had passed since my amicable divorce, and I decided it was time to start dating again. Unsure how to begin, I thought I’d scan the personals column of my local newspaper, I came across three men who seemed like they’d be promising candidates. [ Read More ]